Examine your thoughts; change your feelings

More about how your feelings are a result of your thoughts and not the other way around. Some people have a habit of “emotional thinking” which is a cognitive distortion.

This means that they may feel hurt by the behavior of someone else and think that because they are hurt that the person did that behavior on purpose. “I feel bad because he didn’t agree with me, so he must have disagreed with me to hurt my feelings.”

What helps is if you turn it around and think about what the person said that you didn’t like and what was the intent. Does that person have a habit of saying things to cause pain? Is it really about you? Was that person speaking without thinking about how it would affect you?

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